Seriously Scared

I've spent the last week thinking that nothing was really wrong with my breast--it's just a little red and larger than my left side. The ultrasound showed nothing and the breast specialist didn't think I needed a mammogram, saying it's too risky with the pregnancy. She said although it looks a little infected, there's no real evidence of infection. Then I suddenly read this last night, after hearing about it on the evening news.

I had never heard of inflammatory breast cancer. The most deadly kind that can't be detected by ultrasound or mammogram and often is thought to be an infection. There is no lump associated with this cancer. I was already starting to panick a little.

Then I called my dad, who was on the phone with my aunt. Evidently my cousin, the one with twins, had just had a biopsy done for inflammatory breast cancer that day. They're pretty sure she has it. Symptoms--a rash on her breast that looks infected but isn't.

Oh my God.

I have my next doctor appointment on Monday, so I guess we'll see where to go from there. The only way to diagnose is through a biopsy. The thing is--I don't know what I will do if they confirm cancer. My primary concern is for the twins. I'd rather wait until I've had them before seeking treatment. But with this type of cancer, waiting that long might be too late, for all of us.

Please God don't let this be happening.